It was never like this on Dr. Kildare or House

by Judith Capen and Robert Weinstein

Back in the hospital, living in hospital time and struggling for enough pain relief (the docs are pretty consistent in saying, “We want you to be comfortable,” but then they dole out the drugs parsimoniously, to protect her from addiction? From respiratory failure so the tumors can get bigger? So she doesn’t have too good a time? Not sure.)

When I got here today around 2ish (to find cousins boosting the love and care over and above Aunt Jean on duty) she actually made the eye-rolling noise once as I tried to enforce V’s plan of very small sips.

This was after a very rough night for Kirby and Robert with another syncopy (passing out)—coding a rapid response—all of a sudden how many medical people you can fit in the bathroom? then assisted back to bed with a racing heatbeat, order up two more units of blood. The good news is her blood work is looking better and her lips are no longer chalk white, but her heartbeat is still fast (about 150/min) and she is very weak.

It’s not so rewarding to visit just now: sometimes she is feeling so lousy she just hasn’t got the energy even to SEE her friends. Don’t take it personally.

We’re pretty committed to getting her home but it is hard to imagine, would probably be in an ambulance, it’s the getting up and walking that brings on the synocopy. She wants to be home and there doesn’t seem to be huge amounts they can offer her (although 8 units of blood IS pretty huge). Tabulating vomits is now #/hr not #/day. She’s horribly thirsty but can’t have more than a sip without it triggering a vomit. The only good thing is that the vomits are really small: very small, very very small.

Colleen the nurse was amazing today in helping her use breathing to avoid barfs.

Tomorrow meeting with the GW Palliative Care team to, we hope, strategize getting her out…

We couldn’t be surviving without all of you. Thank you for your caring and your support.