It’s Over

At 2:48 pm today. She flew away.


We love you all and are so grateful for all the love you have shown her and us during this horrible time.

But we would like to ask to be left absolutely alone until the funeral (which we anticipate for Thursday.)

No phone calls please. No food now: plan to bring food to her pot luck repast after the funeral. And bring memories and reminiscences.

Details to follow.



113 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Allison
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 20:42:13

    all my love to all of you.


  2. Kim Franklin
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 20:42:35

    Kirby is with the angels and is, at last, free of the pain and suffering that have been her constant companion over the past five months. She will be greatly missed by so many but her spirit will live on forever. Our love and prayers go out to you all during this difficult time.

    Kim, John and Izzy


  3. Marilynn
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 20:45:46

    all my sympathy goes out to all of you, so very sad to have such a wonderful person leave us too soon she will always be remembered.


  4. Olya
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 20:46:57

    Thank you for letting us know. I feel so grateful to have had the opportunity to know her. And to know you all.

    Knowing her has made my life better.

    My heart goes out to you.




  5. Judy Hadley
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 20:48:29

    We’re with you.
    Judy and Jack


  6. Shelley Temchin
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 20:56:32

    Thank you for letting us know. You are in our hearts.
    Shelley and Tom


  7. Angela C Gier
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 20:59:31

    Our hearts are with you. Thank you for sharing so freely such an intimate and real part of life . . . your life. So many of us are afraid to touch this part . . . but it has it’s place in life. God Bless you all.


  8. Anna Liebowitz
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 20:59:42

    Sending all my love.


  9. temple micah ski club
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 21:01:29

    (Sent from the mountains of France)
    We are greatly saddened to hear the news. Our condolences go out to Judith, Robert, Owen, and the wider Capen-Weinstein mishpacha. May you be comforted among the mourners in Zion.
    TM ski club; Shelley, Ed, and David Grossma (classmate of Kirby’s); the Ashers; the Granofs; Mel Goldberg; Steve Kurzman and Pat Goldman; and the Grausz’s.


  10. Judy Daniel
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 21:04:19

    All my love to all of you in this most difficult time. My deepest condolences on the passing of beautiful Kirby.


  11. Diane Sullivan
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 21:05:39

    May you find strength and peace knowing that Kirby is now free of pain. Kirby has impacted many people with her wit and wisdom, and she is now in a far better place.

    Thank you, Mr. And Mrs. Capen for giving us Kirby. Everyone she met, she touched in a special way, and her spirit will live on forever.


  12. Jordan
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 21:08:10

    I’m so sorry to hear this. When I think of Kirby, I can’t help but smile – a lasting gift I will always treasure. I’m very grateful to have known such an amazing person.


  13. Grace Pokela
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 21:14:27

    My partner’s Irish, and according to Irish tradition, when you find a dime, it means someone who has passed is with you. I found a dime as soon as I walked into my apartment today. I hope that everyone can use this small symbol as a way to feel their love for Kirby and her love for them.

    There are no words I can say right now, but all my thoughts are with you today.

    I love you, Kirby.


  14. Claire Kaufmannire
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 21:16:56

    Love and Light,
    Claire, Roy, Hannah, Micah and Ori
    The Grusin-Kaufmanns


  15. Lynne Church
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 21:17:13

    We are so sorry. Our love and thoughts are with you. Lynne and Jim


  16. Carol Rosenhoch
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 21:17:54

    My words can’t take away your sorrow, but please know that my thoughts and sympathies are with all of you.


  17. Massey/Matthews Family
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 21:18:58

    It’s far too sad for words, but you all are too precious and beloved not to try. Kirby will never be forgotten: she has touched so many lives in so many ways (wonderful to learn of much of it through this blog) and the love that has flowed between you, Kirb and all the rest of us is phenomenal. We cannot say it better than one of your friends did: if love could cure cancer, Kirby would be dancing. Instead, we will all be weeping, but through the tears will find strength in the fortuity of time and space and place that we have been given the AMAZING gift of knowing this incredible, wonderful, remarkable young woman.

    Love to you all, always.

    Kim, Dave, Alex and Robbie


  18. Roberta Meizlik
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 21:23:18

    I am so sorry. My thoughts are with Kirby and all of you. Love, from Roberta


  19. Alex
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 21:23:39

    Heartbroken for you and all the world. Thinking of you all and praying for moments of comfort.


  20. Martha and David Adler
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 21:25:23

    She took parts of all of our hearts with her, and left parts of hers here with us.
    Sending you much love,
    Martha & David


  21. Ellen Hirzy
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 21:26:06

    May sweet Kirby rest in peace. Our love to all of you.


  22. Trackback: New Age Mama: » RIP Kirby Weinstein…
  23. Susan Punnett
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 21:33:46

    Judith and Robert,

    Kirby was a most amazing person – smart, confident, creative, passionate, and giving. Knew her mind and wasn’t afraid to speak it (hmm, wonder where she got that from?) She touched so may lives and was oved by so many. Clearly her spirit will live in all who knew her.


  24. sarahcamionalexander
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 21:41:03

    Words really fall short right now…my last memory with Kirby fills my mind – sitting at your dining room table (as I folded my 4th and 5th crane) with Kirby looking through the atlas and discussing New Zealand and Italy. She was Kirby, despite the pain…and I am glad I had that time. Wout and I will be there on Thursday, please know you all are in our thoughts. Big Hug!


  25. betsy
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 21:42:49

    Kirby taught me how to make friends at work and how to treat everyone who crosses my path like a potential friend. My life is so much fuller for having known her. My prayers are with her family and the rest of us she left behind. Surely she no longer needs them – flying above us, free from the suffering of an earthly existence at last.


  26. Suellen
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 21:51:58

    We are so very sorry. It seems so unfair. Such a wonderful, dynamic young woman. Thank you for sharing the journey with us and for your candor in the face of such a difficult situation. We wish you peace and healing.

    Suellen Billy Eben & Oliver Lazarus


  27. colleenteresa
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 21:53:26

    Dear Judith and Robert,
    You have our hearts, our minds, our prayers and our thoughts. Your dear Kirby was loved by us all and even more than that by many more people who never knew her thanks to all the love she gave to so many. And though she is gone from our sight, she lives in so many hearts. With each passing day those memories grow sweeter. The Almighty now has her borne on the wings of love.
    Now we are with you even more in your loss.
    Please feel my arms around you and my prayers surrounding you.
    With all the love I have,


  28. Diana
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 22:01:38

    Bye, Kirby. You will live in our thoughts and memories. Thank you for being. Thank you for teaching kindness and friendship. You are wonderful.


  29. Elisabeth Kinsey
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 22:01:48

    I only knew Kirby through Olya and found her a delightful person who was fun to talk to and engaging. I am so sorry and my heart goes out to you, her family, at this time.


  30. Nancy Friedman
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 22:03:28

    Love and tears. Nancy and Barry


  31. Jan Greenberg
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 22:05:37

    I was away this weekend visiting my dad in NC. About an hour or so from home (a little before 3 pm, I began thinking about Kirby … and such a wave of love and sadness and a profound sense of mortality came over me that I started to cry and cried the rest of the way home. When I got home, I checked my email, and saw the first line of your entry… my heart is broken, but my love and support are with you now and in the tough times ahead. Kirby’s presence was a gift and blessing for all of us. I will treasure that gift always…


  32. Gloria Mink Edwards
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 22:06:40

    Dear Judith, Robert, and Owen,

    May your happier memories sustain you at this time. We are so deeply sorry for your loss.

    Love and hugs,
    Cousin Gloria


  33. Vini Schoene
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 22:18:14

    Love to you all from Vini and David.
    We’ll be on the lookout for ways to help.


  34. Devin Burke
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 22:28:03

    Kirby was an inspiration to all of us who were lucky enough to know her, as well as those who only knew of her. I will keep her in my heart always. Thoughts and prayers to Judith, Robert, and Owen, and all who loved her.
    My deepest sympathy.


  35. Amy
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 22:31:05

    The body lets go when the pain becomes too much to bear. Kirby, I know you are now free and everywhere. Thank you for touching our lives in infinitely many ways. Thank you for bringing us all together. Rest in peace forever.


  36. Raquel
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 22:36:32

    Kirby was my biology partner in SWW. We helped each other study for quizzes. I will definitely miss her. Such a kind hearted individual may her soul rest in peace!


  37. Cristal
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 22:36:39

    Kirby was a blessing to us all! Thank you for sharing her with us on this journey. I pray your hearts are comforted knowing she touched so many lives in so many positive and creative ways. She was a remarkable young woman with an wonderful personality and an unforgettable smile!


  38. Tanti
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 22:38:13

    My friend Kirby…you were one of my first friends at Smith when we met at Morrow House. My friend, I didn’t think I would have to say goodbye so soon. Thank you for all the laughs that we had, for your kindness and for being such a special and caring person. Love to you, always.


  39. Netty
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 22:39:09

    I’m so very sorry for your loss. May God help you through this difficult time. She is resting now.


  40. morgan
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 22:41:06

    my condolences…words fail. i will light a candle for kirby.


  41. Ann Dye
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 22:44:33

    My love to you all. I always so admired Kirby and her beautiful, fighting and caring spirit. Her star is in the sky.


  42. Sarah Grusin
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 22:55:11

    I send her off with love, such a teacher and friend and companion she has been to us all. To her family: may your hearts fill with the love that we feel for you.


  43. Jennifer
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 22:59:52

    My prayers go out to you and your family. She is finally free of pain.


  44. Kathy Sawyer Atkisson
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 23:05:33

    I’m so very sorry for your loss.


  45. xoT
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 23:10:45

    an amazing life, well lived… and way too short.
    The world is a little dimmer today.


  46. Giang
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 23:17:14

    I am deeply sorry for your loss. May our Kirby rest in peace.


  47. Sheldon and Deirdre
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 23:24:05

    Dear Judith, Robert and Owen —
    What a special brave young lady — you are all in our hearts.


  48. Carolyn & Jeff Serfass
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 23:36:36

    Giant hugs for each of you. Kirby is a beautiful angel.


  49. Ghazaul
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 23:46:59

    Dear Judith, Robert, and Owen,

    I am so sorry for your loss. I am so grateful that I got to know Kirby and she has enriched my life in many ways. Thank you Kirby for all the good times, I know you are in a place free of suffering and pain now and you are with all the angels. You will forever be in my heart. I love you my dear friend.



  50. Alejandra
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 23:48:02

    How unbelievably sad and unfair. Kirby was an amazing woman and the world will be a little dimmer without her and her glowing spirit. Your family is in my prayers.

    Alejandra Bornstein (aka Franklin!)


  51. Steve Lawlor, Susan Ades+family
    Jan 30, 2012 @ 23:53:19

    We are so, so sad to learn your news of Kirby today. Your family has been anchored in our minds for some time now and our hearts go out to you all. Please know that this tremendous loss is shouldered by many.

    Much love

    Steve, Susan, Olivia and Isabelle (Ades-Lawlor)


  52. Susan Tanfield
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 00:00:36

    I almost lost my daughter to a freak pneumonia. You have lost your daughter. I can’t imagine.
    I can’t help but think, as I’ve read your entries and all the entries of love and caring and respect for her, on ‘Kirby Strong”, that Kirby fulfilled her purpose on earth. What wonderful beings all your friends, relatives and friends-of-friends have been and are. You have all blessed me with your words, strength & caring for Kirby.
    Judith, Robert and Owen, my deepest sympathy.


  53. June
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 00:04:06

    I keep crying off and on, but I remember Kirby looking up at me a few days ago when I was visiting and she told me “don’t cry” even when she was drifting in and out, and I was amazed that she smiled for the picture with all the other smithies later in the evening when she was more awake. She was so brave. My heart breaks for all of you. You are in my thoughts.


  54. Deirdre Saunder
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 00:22:41

    Our hearts are broken and our love and sympathy and prayers are with you. Owen, Dani wanted me to send you her love.
    Deirdre, Sheldon, Dani and Madi


  55. david walls-kaufman
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 00:31:58

    This is awful. All of my heart and condolences.


  56. Michele McCabe
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 00:35:44

    A butterfly lights beside us like a sunbeam
    And for a brief moment its glory
    and beauty belong to our world
    But then it flies again
    And though we wish it could have stayed…
    We feel lucky to have seen it.
    Author Unknown

    My sincerest condolences on the loss of your daughter. My heart breaks for you all.


  57. Andy, Elena and Anne Soloviev
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 00:37:29

    Judith, Robert and Owen,
    Our hearts ache for you.
    Anne, Andy and Elena


  58. Roy Kaufmann
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 00:37:29

    I am so sorry for your loss. There’s nothing I could write to make it any better, but know that Kirby touched a lot of lives, even those like me who she never met. Rest in peace, and peace and healing to those who survive her.


  59. Sarah
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 00:41:52

    So much love lives here. It’s beautiful to witness even in such sorrow.
    Judith, Robert, and Owen, my deepest sympathies.


  60. Diane Cain
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 02:04:42

    My deepest sympathies. I didn’t know Kirby. I heard about her from my friend Angela Gier. I have been praying for her for the last couple of weeks from here in Hoboken, NJ. It is clear from this blog and all these posts that she influenced so many lives in many wonderful ways. I, myself, have been touched by her life, which is a testament to her legacy and memory.

    God bless you and much love from a stranger who is now connected.


  61. Margaret Zelljadt
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 02:10:56

    My thoughts are with you. Margaret Zelljadt


  62. Mimi and Walter
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 02:19:15

    We are so very, very sorry. Our hearts go out to you, and our prayers remain with you.


  63. Andi
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 02:27:05

    What a terrible loss. I am so very sorry and send love, prayers and the strength to endure.


  64. Mike and Janice
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 02:30:15

    At such a time as this you have shown us how to live. Our time with you on this island over the last few weeks will live in our hearts and memory as long as we live. Thank you for your generosity of spirit and soul in welcoming us to be with and love Kirby, and also to be with and love you, Judith, Robert, Owen and Jean.
    Mike and Janice


  65. Marjorie ZAPRUDER
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 03:07:51

    My thoughts are with you in this incredibly sad moment. Much love, M


  66. Emily
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 03:10:54

    Judith, Robert, and Owen – my thoughts, heart, and prayers are with you. I’m so sorry for all you’ve had to endure. She is loved by all who knew her, and I’ll never stop missing her.



  67. Margaret and Kim
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 03:11:31

    Althought her trajectory fell way too short, the number she touched is long. We weep, and are immensely glad to have worked and traveled with her. With much love, Kim and Margaret


  68. Dean Rosenthal
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 03:23:47

    I didn’t know Kirby or ever meet her, but this blog, linked by Rabbi Bruce Seltzer of Smith College, moved me to tears. Our condolences. – Dean and Karin Rosenthal, Northampton, MA


  69. Florie D'Orazi
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 03:38:32

    I have and will always remember Kirby for her warmth, her vivaciousness, and her abundance of friends. Judith, Robert, and Owen, I am so sorry and I am sending you all of my love.


  70. fabiana
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 04:05:11

    Its a very sad time, but i will always remember her as a strong, happy and very friendly person. Miss you.


  71. Kate Allen (SWW History Teacher)
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 04:23:21

    I’m so terribly sorry to hear of Kirby’s passing. She was a ray of sunshine in my classroom, and I can still see the beautiful smile that she wore so openly. She was everything hopeful and happy and bright.


  72. EChO
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 04:35:37

    I can’t seem to find the words to express how sad I am right now, nor a way to stop the flow of tears. I can’t believe I was holding her hand and talking to her only yesterday, and she seemed more with it than I did. As I told her what I was up to since Smith, she excitedly told me ‘she remembered’ recalling a conversation from almost 5 yrs ago that had wandered from my memories. Even though her voice was hoarse, there was so much of the resonances in her voice and energy of the Kirby I remembered. I was deeply impressed and touched. I continued to talk to her, promised I wouldn’t hurt her ears with my singing, made feeble attempts to tell some of the corniest engineering jokes from a classes we took together, and admired all the beautiful and colorful cranes surrounding her room, and promised to visit again. I came to offer comfort and support, but with her warmth and caring nature, I think she did the better job, leaving me hopeful and optimistic that she just might pull through somehow. She was a uniter of people who I owe much thanks to for bringing together classmates I hadn’t seen in years. I will never forget that gentle brightening expression when the group of us came back in to her bedside to say good bye. She was so much a kind soul even till the very end. She will be missed greatly by so many.


  73. Becca
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 04:54:28

    Kate and I were talking tonight about all the ways that Kirby made our lives better and what we’ve learned from her. So many ways that I could type forever. I’m so thankful to have met her and have her in my life, and she will always be in my life and heart.

    So much love and hugs to all of you.



    • Cara
      Jan 31, 2012 @ 08:30:42

      Becca, I too feel a deep sense of heartbreak. Beyond questioning, beyond fury, beyond despair, beyond futile attempts to understand WHY, I smile when I picture and see pictures of Kirby’s kind eyes, her gentle smile, her warm and welcoming manner. She was sunshine on this earth. In the short time that I was blessed to know her and count her among my friends, I admired her and loved her undeniable charisma and chutzpah. Kirby was just such a classy lady without even trying to be. She was gracious and poised and incredibly willing to shine her light and warmth upon all of us…. she made us turn towards her like sunflowers toward the sun. Miss you, Kirby.


  74. Regina
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 05:02:00

    I can’t express how much I will be missing Kirby but I have sorted through my photos and found 73 photos of her that I’ll share however you guys want. Digital and printed out.


  75. Elyse
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 05:05:02

    Crying and missing Kirby. She brought so much life to everything and everyone she encountered. I’ll miss the light that Kirby is. Love to everyone.


  76. Judy
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 05:25:18

    Dear Robert, Judith and Owen,
    No words can express how sad we are to hear the news about Kirby’s death. She will always be remembered in our hearts. Thank you for sharing her medical journey with us. I picture her flying free on the wings of a crane straight to Heaven. She has touched so many people ( even those who never met her) with her strength, dignity, fortitude, bravery and love.
    We send our heartfelt condolences and pray that you find some peace in knowing that she is free from pain and suffering and is at peace. We are there for you to help in anyway. I will never forget all of our Jewish Christmas Chinese dinners and movies. We send our love, dear friends.
    Milton, Judy, Katie and Samantha


  77. Nanette
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 06:47:46

    Thank you, Kirby, for planting seeds of beauty and kindness everywhere. Your loving presence will always be felt.


  78. Kristin Bolton-Keys
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 13:20:22

    My prayers to you all may God bless you during this difficult time.


  79. Ann Marie and Herb
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 13:37:35

    Much love to you all. You are in our thoughts and prayers.


  80. Deborah Mitchell
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 13:41:11

    My memories of Kirby are as a gentle and happy child. A beautiful reflection of her family’s love and kindness to everyone. Love and prayers to you all.



  81. Ashley
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 14:02:25

    I am so absolutely sorry.


  82. Chris
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 14:14:09

    She was gracious, generous and kind. And she will remain so forever. I am a better person having known her.


  83. Valerie
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 14:14:52

    “four strings so far to people at the chiropractor”…I have never met Kirby but she sent me a colorful strand of beautiful cranes by way of my brother Stoney who works at the chiropractor’s office. I was being treated for uterine cancer and going through chemo at the time. I will never be able to explain how much it meant to me to receive those cranes from her, someone who didn’t know me but cared enough to send me a gift to let me know she was thinking of me. I love my cranes and they hang in my bedroom. Thank you God for sharing Kirby with me and even though I never got a chance to meet her on earth, I will someday! Peace and Prayers to the family and friends of Kirby.


  84. Mark
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 14:15:42

    Why do the brightest filaments burn such a short time?


  85. Terri Toto
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 14:40:29

    Our hearts and prayers are with you all.


  86. Jason Nickens
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 14:58:10

    My deepest sympathy. I never met her here but her legacy sure will live on. Enjoy your eternal rest!


  87. Elizabeth Lerner
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 15:10:33

    all of my love is with your family…what else can I say?


  88. Ramon
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 15:39:33

    The tragic news hit me on my way home last night, but I haven’t been able to form words suitable to convey my sorrow and condolences. I take small solace knowing that Kirby is in a better place and even though I didn’t know her well, meeting her has given me a reason to pray and a reason to fold.


  89. r david chambers
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 16:41:30

    i have struggled since learning of this yesterday with how to express my sympathy, my love, my desire to support . . . words cannot accurately depict sorrow . . . nor can they truly express joy, the joy in my heart for having known Kirby, for having experienced her generous nature, her giving spirit, her wit, her intelligence, her love for her family and friends – i may not have know her well, but to meet her was to know she was truly a special, special person – if there is anything at all i can do to help you through this time, please do not hesitate to ask –
    with much love,


  90. Gary and Jan
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 18:12:30

    It is only when such moments arrive that the profundity of grief and loss are truly felt and understood. There have been times in past weeks when Jan and I were Robert and Judith, when Kirby was ours, in how we were feeling. We have talked and cried and had our quiet moments, trying to comprehend just what you must be going through. I can relate only to the extent that I cared for and lost my very young father under similar circumstances. It is from that experience that I recognize the feelings that have welled up in Jan and I as we’ve read these posts. The days and months will eventually pass, life will go on, and there will be fond memories. But I am sure that the empty place that remains in me for my Dad is but a small fraction of what you will feel. And for that, our prayers and thoughts shall forever be with you. – Gary and Jan


  91. Rosalie
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 20:12:11

    I find it fitting and strangely comforting to know that Kirby and Ghandi died the same day, 64 years apart. Though they operated on very different skills, Kirby’s ability to knit together a community has always impressed me. Knowing that I can always look to that community for support and comfort as we all keep moving forward is something I am very very grateful to her for.


  92. Rosalie
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 20:13:51

    Sorry, I meant scales, not skills. 🙂


    • Olya
      Jan 31, 2012 @ 21:13:58

      I know what you mean…. but I liked “skills”. Gandhi was great and all, but he was no Kirby. He probably didn’t have her cooking skills, and he certainly didn’t have the Kirbster smile. And I’m almost positive he couldn’t say “Right??” like she did. That’s what keeps running through my head here in Mexico. That smile, and her saying “Right???”


  93. Mark Huck
    Jan 31, 2012 @ 21:58:19

    I can only recall Kirby as a child, but I am sure she grew to be a beautiful and talented person with the support of her loving family, and I am missing her very much today. Robert, Judith and Owen, you are in my thoughts and prayers.


  94. sheira
    Feb 01, 2012 @ 02:38:32

    Kirby’s radiant smile and beautiful laugh will be on my mind every time I think of her. Much love to all of you during this time. Thank you for the updates, they were/are so appreciated. I am so totally sorry.


  95. Rabbi Riqi Kosovske, Beit Ahavah, Northampton
    Feb 01, 2012 @ 03:20:39

    I am so deeply sorry for your loss. Rabbi Bruce has told me that Kirby came to our synagogue before my time here. We will remember her. May you be comforted by the One who is the Place amongst the mourners of Zion and Jerusalem.


  96. Camilo Burich
    Feb 01, 2012 @ 03:33:58

    Kirby I love you. Your brother for eternity.


  97. gail povar
    Feb 01, 2012 @ 03:34:46

    I will never see bright, searching, laughing, large one minute, crinkled up the next, eyes again without remembering Kirby’s. A beer bottle top earring, or an unusual bead will remind me of her sense of humor and her creativity. Her combination of common sense and whimsy was quite remarkable. I loved the comment about her “old soul” — she somehow seemed so “grown” — the only 10year old adult in a classroom full of kids. She left a large imprint on this world!
    Our hearts are with you.
    Gail and Larry


  98. Nadeera
    Feb 01, 2012 @ 03:48:01

    Deepest sympathies. I am so happy I and a couple of smithies spent some time with you all last weekend. Thank you for making us feel welcome although you all were going through the most difficult times. My heart breaks cause Kirby was one of my favorite people at smith and I miss her already. I love u Kirby thank u for touching my life


  99. Lorri Manasse
    Feb 01, 2012 @ 13:52:48

    Our hearts and prayers are with you in this time of incredible sadness.

    Lorri & Russ


  100. Toby Manewith
    Feb 01, 2012 @ 14:43:11

    Owen, Judith, Robert, my hear breaks for you.
    Of course there are no words sufficient to bring comfort. At some distant point perhaps this, from poet Hannah Senesh will bring some meaning. It’s a favorite of mine and seems to capture what so many have said about your beloved Kirby:
    There are stars whose light reaches the earth only after they themselves have disintegrated and are no more.
    And there are people whose scintillating memory lights the world after they have passed from it.
    These lights –which shine in the darkest night – are those which illumine for us the path.


  101. Debra Beland
    Feb 01, 2012 @ 16:48:20

    Kirby was one of the most challenging students I ever had, and I mean that in the best possible way. She took nothing at face value, she challenged every idea, she demanded that everything be taken apart and examined from all sides. She made every classroom she was in richer. Judith, Robert, and Owen, I send you all my love. I feel blessed to have known Kirby.


  102. Jennifir Bailes Hart
    Feb 02, 2012 @ 03:04:52

    Dear Judith, Robert, and Owen,
    I am so deeply sorry and saddened for the loss of Kirby. I remember her as a creative, inquisitive child playing with my cousins, and I am sad I did not get to know her as an adult… It was wonderful and inspiring to read here of the many, many ways she touched so many lives. My heart goes out to all of you in this time. May you be comforted and feel the love sent out to you by your community.
    Jen Bailes


  103. Kevin and Caron Flood
    Feb 02, 2012 @ 03:49:26

    Judith, Robert and Owen,
    We have no children and can’t really comprehend the sorrow that you must feel. We didn’t know Kirby well, but she obviously walked a path in life that has left such a positive affect on so many people and they have expressed such a solid love and respect for her, it is so powerful to read. We hope it can bring some comfort.
    The feeling of sadness is very heavy, all our prayers are with you


  104. Kim Hulse and family
    Feb 02, 2012 @ 14:32:44

    Judith, Robert, and Owen.
    When we moved into our house on this street, Kirby was twelve. Owen had just had a birthday party (maybe his sixth?) with a cowboy theme and you all welcomed us a new neighbors with a wonderful assortment of cowboy chili, biscuits, and cake.
    I blinked, and Kirby was in high school. It was the first I’d heard of this curious phenomenon known as the School Without Walls, and I remember a fun streetside co.versation

    School Without Walls and I remem


  105. kim again
    Feb 02, 2012 @ 17:23:32

    [technical frustrations during my first post (above), so here it is again in its entirety.]

    When we moved into our house on this street, Kirby was twelve. Owen had just had a birthday party (maybe his sixth?) with a cowboy theme and Judith and Robert welcomed us as new neighbors with a wonderful assortment of cowboy chili, biscuits and cake.

    I blinked, and Kirby was in high school. It was the first I’d heard of this curious phenomenon known as the School Without Walls, and I remember a fun streetside conversation with Kirby where she assured me that she wasn’t taking classes under the interstate highway or in the middle of a park somewhere…but explained the permeable nature of a high school based in the middle of the GW campus.

    I blinked again, and Kirby was in college. A SMITH sticker proudly displayed on the family car. It was impressive to hear Kirby talk about the class of women engineers she was studying with at school…clearly a wonderful time in her life.

    Next blink, and I’m shopping for Kirbeads in the Capen-Weinstein house. Kirby is a firmly established, successful adult–a real renaissance woman–living in New York and a smart, creative, beautiful human being.

    And now she’s gone, and I blink back tears…constantly. My heart goes out to you Judith and Robert as nobody, nobody, should ever have to lose a child.

    Your honesty, dignity, humor, sadness, open-ness through this whole awful event has been humbling and much appreciated. May we all live life like Kirby did, and in this way keep her in our hearts and minds.

    Love, Kim, Carl, Nick and Ben


  106. Miriam Grotte
    Feb 02, 2012 @ 22:36:07

    I’m so sorry for this incredible loss, and send you all strength and comfort.


  107. Mark and Libby Gitenstein
    Feb 05, 2012 @ 14:58:31

    Dear Judith, Robert and Owen,
    Our hearts go out to you all in this immensely sad time. We know Kirby is at peace and as many have said, flying with the cranes. As we read this blog from so far away in Romania, we are reminded of what a compassionate and warm community in Temple Micah you all have helped to create and sustain over so many years. You are a very loving family–this makes the agony so much worse for now, but with God’s help and the community of family and friends, will also bring you peace.
    With love and sorrow,
    Mark and Libby


  108. Yael
    Feb 06, 2012 @ 21:20:30

    Am thinking about all of you today. I brought a string of cranes to work with me this morning; they’re hanging in my office now. And despite everything, every time I look up at them they make me smile a little bit. They’re beautiful, and the hope and love that went into making them still shines through.

    So much love, always,



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